Grace Subathirai Nathan is still haunted by the mystery of missing Malaysia Airlines flight MH370.
Her mother, Anne Daisy, was one of the 239 people on board the aircraft that vanished five years ago on Friday.
She told SBS News that to this day she is still waiting for the nightmare to end.
“I live as if she might come through the door at any minute,” Ms Nathan told SBS News.
“It doesn’t ever cross my mind that I am never going to see her again.”
Grace Subathirai Nathan holds up a picture of her mother. Source: SBS News
The Malaysia Airlines flight vanished after taking off from Kuala Lumpur to Beijing on March 8, 2014.
Six Australians were among the passengers on board.
But despite government searches and privately-backed investigations covering 200,000 square kilometres, only three confirmed pieces of the plane’s debris have been found.
Malaysia, China and Australia ended a two-year $200 million underwater search in the southern Indian Ocean two years ago.
The most recent search ended when American company Ocean Infinity called off its own four month search in June last year.
But last week, Malaysia’s Transport Minister Anthony Loke gave some new hope to those still longing for answers.
Mr Loke said the government is open to new proposals from private companies and would welcome “credible leads” and “concrete proposals to resume the search".
“If they can convince us that the new technology can be efficient in terms of the search, then we are more than willing to restart,” Mr Loke.
Ocean Infinity’s search was commissioned on a “no find, no fee” arrangement.
Its CEO Oliver Plunkett said in a video shown at a public memorial for victims that better technology could help bring new findings.
“We haven’t given up hope… We hope we can continue to search in due course,” Mr Plunkett said.
Ocean Infinity's multi-purpose offshore vessel in the southern Indian Ocean off the coast of South Africa. Source: OCEAN INFINITY
Malaysian Prime Minister Mahatir Mohamad also recently told Chanel Nine’s 60 minutes that Malaysia “intends to continue” the search.
The PM said “for as long as there is hope, we will continue to think of ways and means to find out” the plane’s fate.
Ms Nathan is calling on the Malaysian government to keep that promise.
“In the run up to the elections [the Malaysian government] were saying that MH370 is a priority," she said.
“They just keep talking about it. I haven’t seen them take any positive action.”
Grace Subathirai Nathan Source: SBS News
Ms Nathan knows all too well the criticisms from those skeptical of further search efforts.
“[That it is] A waste of time [and] a waste of money. That we should all move on and let it be,” she said.
But she said finding the aircraft is about more than just closure for those families affected.
“MH370 is not history. It is [about] the future of aviation safety... for everyone that flies.”
Grace Subathirai Nathan. Source: SBS News
She said Australia still has a role to play in that mission to find answers.
“I still see Australia as part of the team,” she said.
“If the plane is found I think Australia will become involved again in the recovery of the wreckage and any further investigations."
Despite the cloud of mystery still surrounding the plane’s disappearance, for Ms Nathan the memories of her mother are still vivid.
“She was everything to me. My best friend, my confidant,” she said.
“She was the glue that kept us all together.”
She still hopes that valuable safety lessons could be learned if the plane’s fate can be discovered.
“We have hit so many brick walls and it has been five years,” she said,
“[But] if we don’t find the plane how can we prevent it from happening again.”
