TRANSCRIPT
Dr Billy Garvey wasn't always certain his future would turn out the way it has.
Growing up in a disadvantaged family, Billy was exposed to violence at a young age.
“So I grew up in a disadvantaged community, single mum worked multiple jobs. Neither of my parents finished high school. I almost didn't finish high school. I got kicked out. And I also witnessed a lot of domestic violence from a particularly one of my mum's partners. My parents separated when I was very young.”
Billy ended up engaging in violent behaviour in early adulthood.
“But I still struggled with authority figures in my twenties as well. I was still getting into lots of fights and saw masculinity as physical prowess and power and aggression and hostility and violence was the way to do that because that's what I'd witnessed growing up. But it's also what our media shows us is that what a real man is is someone who comes in and pushes people down who are doing wrong or try to take what's his and all of that stuff.”
Billy says he was lucky enough that a school outside his area gave him another chance, after being rejected multiple times.
While he continued to confront challenges in his twenties, Billy says the absence of punitive authority at this school meant he was able to finish high school.
This eventually led him to do the work he does today as a developmental paediatrician at one of Australia's biggest hospitals, helping children like himself.
“I really found my calling in my work, and I think I'm trying to catch those kids as early as possible because I know what my own experiences was like. I know what my mum's experience was like, and I can meet those parents and build trust with them and meet those kids and build trust with them too. And then I can help learn what those skills that they're missing are, make sure they're succeeding in their relationships. They have the feel of success in the things that matter to them. Build secure self-esteem, show them that they matter, show them how to regulate emotions, how to succeed in relationships. All of that stuff is this beautiful opportunity that I have that's really revisiting my own childhood struggles.”
The federal government has announced $23 million in funding towards early intervention programs across the country, looking to break the cycle of family, domestic and sexual violence.
It targets boys aged 12-18 who are at risk of using, or have used family, domestic or sexual violence.
An estimated 22% of adults have experienced childhood abuse and/or witnessed parental violence before the age of 15, according to the Australian Bureau of Statistics, and an estimated 8 million Australians aged 18 and over have experienced physical or sexual abuse by an adult since the age of 15.
Minister for Social Services Amanda Rishworth says the programs form a key part of the government's National Plan to end Family, Domestic and Sexual Violence in a generation.
“We know that children, particularly men and boys who have experienced family and domestic violence or other adverse childhood experiences, are more likely to choose to use violence, and therefore, we know that if we are going to break the cycle, we must work with these boys and men to make sure that the cycle is not repeated.”
The Domestic Violence Action Centre in Ipswich, Queensland is one of the centres set to deliver these early intervention programs.
Amie Carrington is their chief executive and says their 'Break the Cycle' program looks to build positive masculinities.
“Government funding is essential to the success of Specialist Domestic Family and sexual violence services, and it's really important to be doing innovative pilots like the Breaking the Cycle program. If we want to achieve ending gender-based violence in one generation, it's services like this that are going to make a real difference alongside everything else that we're doing.”
This positive masculinity is something Billy actively encourages in his clinical work daily.
“I saw a child this morning, a gorgeous 16-year-old kid who was in residential care when I met him, really violent, wasn't allowed to attend school, couldn't live in his family home because of how violent he was, severe developmental trauma growing up. And now he's becoming this beautiful man that knows it's okay to have feelings. It's okay to get angry. It's not okay to hurt people because of that. And he's learned the skills of how to deal with that anger. And a lot of men never learn that.”
Those working in the domestic and family violence space certainly understand how important early intervention is to break the cycle of violence perpetrated by men.
Eliza Arbaci is Family Violence Practice Leader at Meli and explains the 27 week program she facilitates to help change men's behaviour.
“So we really invite the men to wrestle with a lot of their beliefs and attitudes towards women and their children and their role as men in the family. So that can take a little bit of work because often when men come into the program, they're in denial. I sort of use the analogy, they've burnt their house down and now they're sort of sitting in the ruins of their burnt house and they have to really face that. That's quite traumatic for a lot of them as well.”
She welcomes the federal government's investment in preventative programs for young boys, having worked with younger 18 to 24 year-old men in behavioural change.
“So we have to really think about what's happening for them. So we have a trauma informed lens in that category. And it's interesting because young people, one minute, they're victim survivors in our system, and the next minute their perpetrators in the adult system. So we have to really think about when a young person's coming into an adult program, they might be 18, but they might also be operating still at a 14, 15, 16-year-old level. And so we have to address that.”
But Ms Arbaci also acknowledged the issue is complex for young people, particularly when it comes to intergenerational trauma and repetitive environments of family violence.
“A child from intergenerational trauma has drivers of powerlessness, fear and disrespect at the base of their trauma. They're highly reactive, so you sort of have to think about what's going on there, and then you have to think, will the parents be involved in the change process for that young person? Because if that young person is still stuck in a family where family violence is present, how else do they defend themselves or if they feel powerless, that they are reactive against the oppression in the house. And I think we have to educate parents in the roles that they are adopting and the beliefs that they're creating within their children.”
So what do these prevention programs mean for women who are so often victim-survivors of men's violent behaviour?
Katherine Berney, Director of the National Women's Safety Alliance, says it's vital to provide an alternative, more positive messaging for men who are currently inundated with men's rights activist content.
“And it's a real problem because when you think about some of these influences from the manosphere, we need to consider that they meet a need, they meet a need for these boys, and those boys shouldn't feel bad about having emotional needs, being curious about their life, trying to understand what it means to be a man, understanding sexuality and masculinity. It's actually really normal and they shouldn't be demonised for those needs. But what we need to do is understand how to meet those needs in a more positive and healthy way. And I think this program is a great first step in that direction.”
She says this in turn can ensure men and boys who themselves can be victims of violent behaviour feel safe to share their experiences.
“We need to allow people the same way we do with all victim survivors, to have a safe space to unpack harmful behaviours that they've been exposed to. We need to provide them the same trauma and recovery. We need to know that the interventions that work with female victim survivors also will work with male victim survivors. And we need to provide those early intervention pieces to stop that cycle of abuse. We haven't had something like this before. And we need it.”
