The runner-up of Bachelor Australia has taken to Instagram to share a powerful message about the impact of slut-shaming.
Abbie Chatfield, 24, faced criticism from viewers for expressing her sexuality on the reality TV show, with host Osher Günsberg on Twitter.
Now, in a new post on social media, Chatfield has addressed the double-standard and criticism she's experienced, slamming the shaming she has experienced by Bachelor viewers.
“Things I got slut shamed for on #thebachelorau: this bikini, my skirt at hometowns, multiple cocktail party gowns, kissing matt ‘without a date’ and at a cocktail party (out of sight of anyone), pashing Matt in various locations with varying degrees of intensity, honestly admitting that I wanted to have sex with a man I was dating for 10 weeks and all around just ‘using sexuality to manipulate Matt,'” she writes in the post.
“This is something I did not expect in 2019. Sex is essential to a successful relationship for me, as is sexual chemistry and the ability to express that comfortably with my partner. I saw commentary around my sexuality (rightly) calling out slut shaming and double standards regarding my pash sessions with Matt, with responses of ‘I’m not slut shaming her she is just manipulative/dumb/aggressive/only wanting sex’.”
She continues: “To insinuate that any relationship is less valid because of a strong physical connection is counterintuitive – the defining factor between a platonic and romantic relationship is physcial expressions of affection. I saw many comments about me having ‘nothing between my ears’ or that I was ‘so insecure she can’t talk to him so they just kiss’. The public see ten minutes of a twelve hour date, it is insulting to both myself and Matt to assume he took me right until the end purely for a snog.”
Chatfield, who became runner-up when Bachelor Matt Agnew professed his love for winner Chelsie McLeod, went on to address her critics: “I’d like those who think that I was manipulative to TRULY examine why you believe that. On most occasions, it comes down to a core belief that a woman who is ‘seducing’ a man has ulterior motives, while a man doing the same is merely being romantic.”
She adds: “If it isn’t that, it is based off the opinion voiced of other contestants on the show, not my actions. I was always honest, authentic and expressive which can sometimes rub people the wrong way.
"It’s okay to not like me – it is not okay to assume that I am less of a person or less worthy of love because I like to have sex and can talk freely and openly about it.”
