Laila Ali, 16, is a student at the Islamic College of Brisbane who appears on new SBS documentary series . She took part in a unique social experiment in which 12 students and families from very different backgrounds and religions are thrown into each other’s worlds. Here, Laila talks about making her first non-Muslim friend.
My parents are from Somalia – they left because of the civil war that began in the ’90s. My parents had decided to go to America, but then September 11 happened. It was a really difficult time for them but they wanted to fight for our future, so they made the decision to come to Australia.
I’m the middle of five kids, and my cousin lives with us, too. Being able to follow our religion freely – without any hate – was one of my parents’ top priorities. It is one of the reasons they put us in an Islamic school. My parents have always been quite closed off about me meeting non-Muslims, because they thought they’d influence me to do bad things. They are very protective.
Growing up here, sheltered in Australia, in an area where it’s very multicultural, I never, ever experienced the things my parents did. They’ve seen guns shooting, their own family being killed. The fact that I never experienced that because they decided to come here – I can’t put into words how much it means to me that they did that for us.
Laila (second from left) with her family. Source: Supplied
I never experienced the things my parents did. They’ve seen guns shooting, their own family being killed… I can’t put into words how much it means to me that they (came here) for us
The Swap experiment was a make-or-break moment. Either I find out whether Christians like us, or not. Would it break the stereotype I had of them not being religious? The stereotypes that everyone had? Would taking part in the experiment break them, or confirm them?
Before The Swap, I was shy. I felt like my real personality came out and everyone really enjoyed it. I could be myself without being judged. After that, nobody’s words – no matter what they said – got to me, because the insecurity I had was just in my head.
I never knew it would be so easy to talk to non-Muslims. It was really weird how normal they were
The biggest thing I learnt, though, was that we are more similar than we are different. I never knew it would be so easy to talk to non-Muslims. It was really weird how normal they were. I thought that Christians would be quite similar to us in a religious sense, but maybe not as humorous.
When I met Eliza, the non-Muslim student I was paired with, first of all, she looked different to what I thought. I talked to her about everything and she was really understanding. She was really patient with my introversion. I didn’t expect to make a good friend during the experiment – I thought my partner would be a white girl who didn’t know anything about Islam and who was an extrovert and scary, I guess. We started a messaging streak during filming and we’re still going at it, and I just talked with her yesterday.
Eliza is Catholic and I thought Catholics and Christians were completely different religions, I had no idea. I didn’t even know what a synagogue was. I felt really ignorant, and felt that my school should teach us about other world religions. There’s nothing more intimate than sharing your love for your religion.
Now, if I go up to somebody, whether they’re a Sikh wearing a turban or a Christian priest, I’d confidently be able to speak to them about anything. At the end of the day, we’re all human.
When my parents met my buddy, Eliza, they really opened up. We had never properly welcomed a non-Muslim to our house before. Now, if I made a new friend, I feel they’d allow me to go to their house. Before, they probably wouldn’t have let me because they didn’t know what to expect. They are very stubborn in their views. I think this experiment not only changed me, but changed my whole family.
If I’m being honest, before the experiment, I wasn’t really open to having friends who weren’t Muslim, because I felt like we couldn’t relate on any level about anything. But that got debunked really quickly.
Buddies: Eliza and Laila. Source: SBS On Demand
You befriend someone for their personality and who they are and not for what they wear or what religion they are from. My parents always want what’s good for me, so as long as someone’s a good person, then I don’t think they’d mind me being their friend at all.
You befriend someone for their personality and who they are, not for what they wear or what religion they are from
I used to have this big anxiety when I went out in public with someone who is not visibly Muslim – like my dad or my brother or my little sister, who doesn’t wear a hijab – that when people saw them with me, they’d realise they’re Muslim and subject them to the same kind of hatred I’ve been subjected to. But I love my hijab and I’ve grown confident enough not to worry about the reactions of other people – if they’re ignorant, that’s on them.
Why should I care so much about other people’s opinions? I should be proud of being Muslim, it’s something I and my family chose.
premieres on Wednesday 8th March at 8.30pm on SBS and . The three-part documentary series continues weekly, with episode two airing on 15th March and episode three on 22nd March.
